“Why should men stay in a sexless marriage?”
“What is marriage without sex?”
Marriage is a sanctioned union that allows for steady bedroom exercises. Lol! You get the gist, right?
However, this is just a part of marriage.
It is much more than that, and some of the other features of the marriage make some men stay in a sexless marriage.
Read on to discover seven reasons men stay in a sexless marriage.
7 Astounding Reasons Men Stay In A Sexless Marriage
Is it safe to say that men are known for their unwavering commitment to a thing?
Well, not all men, but some.
The reason a man will stay in a sexless marriage might be because of his commitment and dedication to his partner.
Sex or not, the union can still go on as a healthy one because both parties are committed to each other.
This deep commitment might have resulted from his nature or a general view of life.
Maybe he sees something in her that fuels his commitment to the marriage, or his values in the union have escalated above sex and physical desire.
He could also be a person of faith who believes in the sacredness of his wedding vows.
It makes him unwavering in his dedication to her.
This kind of man does not think that marriage is all about sex.
While sex can be a builder of intimacy, it does not define the entire marriage.
In the opinion of others, this reason might sound stupid.
Imagine telling someone you’re still committed to your marriage and your wife despite the lack of sex. ‘I can’t leave her,’ you say
The first question that people will ask is what brand of weed you’re on because anyone will see that as something quite unsettling.
But it’s your marriage, right?
And while one reason can be a commitment to your partner.
For another, it might just be the good ol’ concept we know as LOVE.
2. His love flame still burns
When we think of love, we think of romance.
We think of how a couple first got married, the experiences of their honeymoon, romantic dates, and the events of the bedroom.
However, love is expressed in different ways, and one universal expression of love is sacrifice.
For some men, the kind of love between him and his wife is enough for him, irrespective of sex.
Love in a marriage is not all romance and sex; it also encompasses communication, listening, attention, and getting each other.
Simply put, she makes him feel happy and alive.
These might be enough for a man to stay in a sexless marriage.
3. The fear of the unknown
The question some men would ask themselves if they decide to leave a sexless marriage is, “Where do I start from?”
Not everyone is all for change.
Of a truth, exiting a marriage because of sex is easy, but starting another one is slightly tricky.
What if he enters another one, and the emotional connection is just not there?
It’s like moving from frying pan to fire.
These sets of men would rather endure a sexless marriage than venture out into the unknown, especially if other aspects of their marriage are working.
4. He is playing the double agent
Like the two faces of a coin, a man in a sexless marriage might be playing the double side.
One side within his marriage and the other outside his marriage.
The fact that his union is sexless just opens him up for opportunities that abound outside his marriage, and like a well-trained double agent, he keeps both sides unsuspicious and clueless.
Because he wants to keep his marriage, he goes outside just for the ‘knacks’ as Nigerians would call it. And still keep the home intact.
It is Paramount to know that love and sex are two different things for a man.
A man in a sexless marriage may be getting his needs met by his side chick.
Thus, he might play it cool with his wife, but playing both sides like a Russian spy might be the case with him.
5. He hopes for a change
Suppose a medical condition caused the issue of no sex in the marriage, pregnancy or post-pregnancy complications, or a tough season his wife is going through.
In that case, the man may endure a sexless marriage.
He might still be staying because he hopes things will return to normal.
It is not easy to forget the good times when sexual fantasies existed in your marriage.
Armed with the understanding that they are only going through a season, the man may anchor on the hope that things will improve.
6. His religious beliefs
Perhaps the words of his wedding vows ‘for better for worse, for rich and for poor, in sickness and in health, till death do us part,” has a massive hold on his actions.
While some people are very casual about these vows, others hold on solemnly to them and would give their lives to stay faithful.
Truth be told, such men are rare, but some others have strong religious beliefs that encourage them to work out things in their marriage.
This may be why he stays in a sexless marriage.
7. It’s all for the children
It is not a thing of joy for a child to grow up without a father.
Unfortunately, children suffer the most from divorces and separations.
An African proverb says, “When two elephants fight, it is the ground that suffers.”
A man can decide to stay in a sexless marriage because of his children.
He may have experienced having an absent dad and decided that his children do not deserve such.
This can fuel his decision to endure the sexless marriage for the well-being of his children.
As a matter of fact, the couple may be great parenting partners even though they lack sexual intimacy.
The idea of a man staying in a sexless marriage is incredible, but the variables differ for different marriages.
Sometimes, the no-sex phase might just be temporary, but when it is a prolonged situation, it can cause a ripple effect that becomes a big problem.
To solve the issue and get the couple back on track sexually, the first thing is to get down to the root cause of it.
Communication helps and therapy if needed.
Couples should not shy away from seeking professional help sorting marital challenges; it helps a lot.
In general, the decision to leave or stay in a sexless marriage is unique to every man, as we have established in this article.
It is however important to note that a sexless marriage, which might not be fun, does not equate to unhappiness.
This is debatable, but it is a fact.