How the world moves fast and time becomes very fickle.
To restore the years that have been wasted is not an easy feat.
Starting over is not like eating a slice of bread.
It is like trying to mouth a whole burger in one bite.
It’s not impossible, but it’s hard.
It is better to know what it is you’re doing before it gets too late, do not wait until you discover that you have been in a relationship with yourself all this while.
Thinking about it will make you realize that your single life was better compared to the situation you find yourself in now.
At this point, you will miss the days when you were all by yourself and didn’t have to worry about whether or not your relationship is still intact.
Those times your brain was not subdivided into segments equally, working tirelessly to fathom any loophole in your relationship.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not against being in a relationship.
So long as it is a healthy one, where you don’t have to necessarily worry about the status of the relationship.
It will become too hurtful if you later discover that you have been wasting your time in your relationship with him.
Let’s highlight some signs that tell you’re wasting your time with him.
6 SIGNS YOU ARE JUST WASTING YOUR TIME IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM
1. HE NEVER GIVES YOU ATTENTION
‘I’m busy, let’s talk later’ If this has become his mantra, then the realization should be slowly dawning on you.
Maybe you’re the type that appreciates being paid attention, you would be greatly hurt by his actions towards you.
The truth is that you might not be asking for so much from him, but whenever you need to talk to him, he is always ‘busy,’ and it becomes recurrent in their relationship, these women will also meet the same fate as you the ‘attention seeking type.’
Of a truth, he might be busy, don’t let us assume he lies every time he pulls the busy card.
But once it seems like you’re the one putting all of the effort and his busy card is always played on the table, there will be suspicions of him being unfaithful in that relationship.
Maybe there’s another woman who gets his full undivided attention, and you’re just In a corner thinking he is ‘busy at work’
And like a magic stick, the busy card seems to work on you.
Before you keep on falling for the trick like an audience at a magic show, have a rethink and Know that if he is not giving you attention at all is a possible sign that you’re just wasting your time in a relationship with him.
2. YOU’RE NOT HIS PRIORITY
Similar to not giving you attention, he might not also prioritize you in his life.
You do not come first on his list of “important things.”
Like a shopping list that is arranged in an order of decreasing price range, instead of being an expensive food item that makes the first position on the list, your position in his life is more like that of a popsicle in a list of highly expensive items.
In all essence, you carry no weight in his life.
And being in a relationship with him is just equivalent to wasting your time.
Quite a number of things might be eating up his priorities, it might be work or a drive for wealth.
Some men pursue that(wealth) and nothing else, so a woman with him in that pursuit will be more like an NPC (Non-playable character) that carries no priority in his life.
Do you remember how NPCs are in video games?
Exactly, just there for decoration, the player has an objective, and an NPC is not a part of it.
While some men might just be testing the waters around, and the reason you’re not a priority is because there are other women he elevates over you.
Once you start to feel like a drag along in the relationship, and he devotes his time to work or other things, it is a telltale sign that you have been wasting your time.
3. HE DOESN’T TALK ABOUT THE FUTURE OF THE RELATIONSHIP
Evasiveness about the topic of ‘So where are we going as a couple?’ i.e. (the next step) is a hint that there’s no light at the end of the tunnel and you are just wasting your time.
If you both do not make plans for the future of the relationship, if it is starting to feel as if you’re the only one making an effort for the future of the relationship, then your time is being invested in the wrong thing.
Why commit to someone that doesn’t contribute to the progress of the relationship?
It might be that he is tired of the relationship, or he is not ready to commit to a future in that relationship.
We all do hope for a bright future ahead of us, and maybe your mind has projected into the unseen future and it has drafted out a plan for marriage.
However, your man does not see all that, he will always say, ‘Let’s just see how it goes’ till time becomes lost to you.
You know I established earlier that it is hard to make up for lost time.
So before you keep wasting your time in a relationship with him, ask yourself if he is ready to make plans for the future of that relationship.
4. HE DOES NOT RESPECT YOU OR YOUR OPINIONS
Like in a military regime, you do not have a say on anything in the relationship; your opinions are always at the mercy of his validation.
He does not respect you and shrugs every opinion you give; if that is the kind of man you’re in a relationship with, then you are better off alone.
No one deserves to be disrespected and treated like a ‘nobody’ in the relationship, no matter how long you’ve both been together.
Your man should make sure that your opinion is heard and respected.
If not, it’s time for a re-evaluation of that relationship.
Maybe you have even confronted him about him respecting you, too, and that you matter, and he gets angry over it; that’s a glaring sign that you have been indulging a disturbed individual.
You have been playing away your time, to say the least, and it’s better to move on than to go forward and regret the consequences later.
5. HE HARDLY COMMUNICATES
Part of being in a healthy relationship and love thrives is where both of the parties involved enjoy one another is through their communication.
Constant communication builds friendship and fosters an emotional connection between you and your partner.
But if this is starting to be a scarce commodity in your relationship, it is a prompter to check that your clock has started ticking and time is gradually being wasted.
At the start, it will be excuses of ‘I totally forgot to call you’ then graduates to not talking for almost a week.
And as time goes on, he has probably forgotten he has a partner.
Solely because the communication factor is no longer there.
Believe me, he will always have an excuse for it; it’s like men have a hidden grace for excuses and lies.
Know that if this happens, it’s a sign that you’re wasting your time in a relationship with that kind of man.
6. HE FLIRTS WITH OTHER WOMEN
He does it with no remorse or caution, he claims he is just that ‘friendly’ and keeps flirting with other ladies.
It’s either he is done with you, or he is about to be.
While you’re together, he makes comments that are flirtatious to other women, and he does it without considering your feelings and you are wondering what is wrong.
As this continues to happen, there will be a point when you rethink and ask yourself whether you’re in a relationship with him or you’re just there in his life as one of ‘those girls.’
Well, you don’t have to worry your brain too much.
It’s simple, he no longer considers you as being part of the relationship.
This feeling is more like an impending end to that relationship.
And it is more than enough to tell you that you’re just wasting your time in the relationship.
A man can make any excuse that will indirectly tell you that you have been wasting your time in that relationship.
While every relationship is not perfect, and there might be times when any of these signs come into play, be it; lack of communication, not giving attention, flirting, and so on.
And all that will just be part of the errors that occurred in the relationship.
In other words, it was just part of the highs and lows of the relationship, which is normal.
However, it is the recurrent happening of these signs that becomes dangerous and threatens the relationship, which will prompt you to check and recheck to know if you have been wasting your time or not.