9 Signs He Cares About You But Doesn’t Love You

Has a guy been showing you care, and you’re beginning to look forward to the time he will ask you to be his girlfriend formally?

You may need to find out if he is interested in a relationship with you or only cares about you.

And this is one assumption ladies tend to make a lot.

Some ladies are quick to interpret acts of care towards them as love.

Whereas the guy is only being thoughtful because you are his friend, and there are no strings attached.

Are you surprised a man can care about you without being interested in further action?

Well, it’s a thing, which may be due to several reasons.

He may be phlegmatic – most phlegm guys are very loyal to relationships, and he can come off as being extra caring to the opposite sex.

Also, he may have a soft spot for you because he perceives you as fragile and believes you need to be tenderly cared for.

It may be a result of his upbringing – he was brought up to care for ladies, he grew up as the only boy amongst girls, or he is an only child who sees you as the sister he never had.

These are just a few reasons he can care about you without having a romantic interest.

Now, for the avoidance of doubt, let’s look at the signs that he cares about you but doesn’t love you;

9 Signs He Cares About You But Doesn’t Love You

1. He expresses kindness towards you

Signs He Cares About You But Doesn’t Love You

When a guy has a soft spot for you, he will assist you.

I remember when I was job hunting; there was this friend who made it a point of duty to help me send my CVs to companies.

When I went for interviews, he always called to know how it went.

He was so caring and thoughtful, but our relationship was strictly platonic.

That a guy seems interested in your welfare and goes out of his way to help you doesn’t mean he is interested in pursuing a relationship with you.

Some guys are very kind, especially to ladies, but it doesn’t mean they want anything from you.

It is important to avoid jumping to conclusions so you don’t get hurt.

 2. He texts and calls you

 A guy can love to initiate conversations with you because he enjoys the fact that you know how to hold one.

He might call you frequently because you’re a delight to speak to.

However, this doesn’t mean he is in love with you.

This might be especially true of carefree, extroverted guys who are quick to make friends and like to talk.

I understand your argument might be, why call me often when you don’t love me?

This is why sometimes, defining a relationship is essential so that no one gets hurt at the end of the day.

While some ladies could interpret frequent calls and chats as an invitation to something more profound, a guy might not see it that way.

He could enjoy talking with you because he loves how you reason and the vibes you bring into conversations.

3. He’s protective of you

Signs He Cares About You But Doesn’t Love You

Guys who are caring are generally protective of the females in their lives.

He shows concern for you and never wants you to get hurt.

Have you been friends with a guy who would even give you tactics of his fellow men in the dating pool? 

If you, by chance, tell him about some guy who’s asking you out, he could go on your behalf to investigate to confirm if he’s a player or the real deal.

He would even tell you to be careful so you don’t get heartbroken.

He’s that guy who will call you every minute to ensure you’re safe when you’re out late.

I know it’s possible to want to assume that he loves you, and that’s why he’s so protective, but don’t be mistaken.

That may be how he was raised and cared for his sisters, and he’s also doing the same with you.

4. He remembers details

Signs He Cares About You But Doesn’t Love You

Ladies are blown away when a guy remembers essential details about them.

For instance, their birthdays, graduations, etc.

Some guys grew up in families that placed priority on celebrating milestone achievements.

If this is who this guy is, that might be why he tends to remember memorable days of your life and take his time to celebrate you like it will be your last.

While you and others might think the guy is falling for you, he’s just doing it because he cares for you and nothing else.

5. He listens to you

Signs He Cares About You But Doesn’t Love You

Men generally tend to be impatient when it comes to chitchatting.

They have short attention spans.

But they become very different and super attentive listeners when they genuinely care about someone. 

If a guy takes his time to listen to you, know that he cares about you.

Is he your go-to guy when you are having a not-so-good day at work?

You can pick up your phone and call him to ‘download’ the gist while he listens with rapt attention.

Have you found a confidant in him, and it’s just so easy to unburden while he holds your hands in the assurance that all will be well? 

As impressive as this act is, and it’s normal to want to believe that he has a thing for you, he might not.

He might just be doing that because he believes that’s what friends do, and he wants to always be there for you.

Don’t be surprised if he asks you to meet his girlfriend tomorrow.

6. He opens up about his struggles

Signs He Cares About You But Doesn’t Love You

Generally, men find it hard to be vulnerable with just anyone and everyone they meet.

Their parents raise them to be strong and be a man. 

Hence, the majority manage their pains.

But if he finds someone who he cares about and cares for him, too, he could start being more open.

If this guy has broken that barrier and shares deep things about himself and his struggles, know he cares about you.

However, it doesn’t mean he loves you.

He sees you as someone he can trust and also cares for him as he does for you.

7. He tells you

A sign that he merely cares about you and doesn’t want any romantic attachment is that he tells you himself.

He might say it jokingly or in between gists or never say the words “I love you.”

This is because that’s how he truly feels about you.

It would be great to check your heart to avoid building castles in the air.

8. He plans his future without you

Even though you are close, he doesn’t situate you in his future plans.

This is usually not in the regard of cutting you off, but he speaks of someone else when the future is mentioned – his girlfriend.

He might even look for your advice on how to make her happy or surprise her.

This indicates that he cares for you as a friend but is in love with another.

9. He is open about his relationship

There is a lady in his life, and he is always talking about her.

He introduces you to his girlfriend or fiancée and is honest about his relationship.

This openness also extends to her as he doesn’t hide you from her and is pretty clear about his intentions towards you.

If anything, this shows that he sincerely cares about you and seeks nothing more from you.


It’s easy to catch feelings for a guy who cares about you, but finding out if he loves you is very important.

Communication and healthy boundaries are a must at this point to avoid heartbreak.

If you feel like you can’t quite place the kindness of your male friend, then it is time to have a conversation to find out what he wants.

2 thoughts on “9 Signs He Cares About You But Doesn’t Love You”

  1. Why is this addressed to the “ woman”? The man involved in these “ relationships” should just grow some balls and be open and honest. I wouldn’t want to sit around wondering does he or doesn’t he love me…and I sure never would get my heart broken over any man who didn’t make his love and his intentions crystal clear. In other words, you as a “ man” you get a clue. Don’t worry about we poor little women. We know. We have always been onto you, w hatever your game was and continues to be. I know I ain’t wastin any of my true heart Acheson the likes of you.


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