The bedroom is a place of intimacy where you can reconnect with your partner and explore your desires.
But how do you know if you’re doing it right?
We all have different ideas about what constitutes good sex—and we all have unique ways of expressing ourselves in the bedroom.
But if you’re looking for signs that your sexual skills are on point, here are a few things to look out for:
10 Signs You’re Good in Bed
You have a good sense of humor
Humor is the spice of life and can make your intimate moments much more pleasurable.
It can be as simple as an off-color joke or an awkward pause that makes you laugh, but it’s a key component to being good in bed.
Humor is important because it helps you get out of your head and into your body—which is precisely where you want to be when you’re having sex.
You want to feel all of your senses engaged so you can really experience what’s happening.
Humor helps with this by taking some pressure off the moment, allowing you and your partner to relax and enjoy yourselves without worrying about what will happen next or what could go wrong.
Humor also helps to build intimacy, which can make for a more meaningful sexual experience because you and your partner get to feel comfortable being vulnerable with each other.
They say if you’re not laughing when doing it, you’re probably doing it with the wrong person.
2. You can communicate what you want and need from your partner
Communication is one of the most important parts of being good in bed.
When you’re good in bed, you can communicate what you want and need from your partner.
And when it comes to communicating with your partner, the more straightforward and direct the better.
If you’re feeling neglected or bored, you don’t just sit there and take it, you tell them respectfully and lovingly
And if they’re not giving you what you want, you let them know that too.
Being able to communicate what you want from your partner will help them understand what feels good for you and help them give it to you more often.
This will also help prevent problems in the future because they’ll be more aware of what’s going on with their body as well as yours.
3. You know how to make your partner feel comfortable with their body and sexuality
Being able to bring out your partner’s confidence is one of the most important things you can do for them sexually, which is why this is such an important sign that you’re good in bed.
The truth is, being good in bed is not about you, it’s about how you make your partner feel and what your partner says about you.
So, when you’re good at making your partner feel comfortable, you give them the space they need to explore their own sexuality and let go of any insecurities or fears that might come up during sex.
Because if they’re not comfortable with who they are, they won’t be able to be truly present in the moment and enjoy what you’re doing together.
4. You know how to read your partner’s body language and respond accordingly
Being a good lover means knowing how to read your partner’s body language and respond accordingly.
When you’re able to do this, you can tell what they like and don’t like, which leads to more satisfying sex for the both of you.
For example, if your partner is moving towards you and pulling you closer, then you know that they are enjoying what you are doing.
If your partner is moving away from you or pulling their legs up to their chest, then you know that something isn’t working for them.
It can be difficult to get these things right on the first try, but once you start picking up on the signs it becomes second nature—and that’s when things start to get really fun!
5. You know how to give pleasure as well as receive it yourself
A lot of people are good at giving pleasure—but not everyone knows how to receive it.
To do so takes knowing your body, knowing what you like and don’t like, having a sense of your boundaries and limits, but also having the ability to push past those when you want or need to.
Being good at sex also means that you are able to communicate your desires clearly and effectively—and this starts with knowing yourself well enough to be able to articulate what those desires are.
If you can’t tell them what gets you off (and why), how can they give it to you?
6. You’re willing to experiment with new positions and techniques
This makes you a good lover in bed because when it comes to sex, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach that works for everyone.
It takes a lot of creativity and flexibility to find what works for you and your partner.
The more you experiment, the more you discover about what works for you and what doesn’t—and that makes for a much better experience than just sticking with what you know.
And if you’re not willing to put in the effort to try new things out, then it’s likely your sex life will be stale and boring.
7. You’re not afraid of a little bit of messiness
Part of what makes sex so fun is its unpredictability.
If are afraid of getting messy, you’ll never be able to enjoy the kind of wild ride that comes only with letting go.
You know that sometimes, in the heat of the moment, things can get a little messy.
And you don’t mind.
You welcome it.
You embrace it.
This makes you great in bed.
Not being afraid of messiness doesn’t mean that you’re messy in general.
What it really means is that you don’t mind getting a little dirty when you’re getting it on with your partner.
You can let go of your inhibitions and let yourself be vulnerable—not just physically, but emotionally too.
8. You’re not afraid to be a little kinky
When you’re good in bed, you know how to draw out your partner’s pleasure by being kinky.
One of the most important elements of any intimate relationship is trust—and one way to foster that trust is by being willing to try new things together.
That’s where kink comes in.
Kinkiness is all about exploring the boundaries of what’s acceptable and what isn’t.
It’s not just about doing things that are considered “weird” or “taboo”—it’s about going beyond those things and finding new ways to make each other feel good.
Anything that gets your partner excited is kinky!
Kinky bedroom behavior can include:
Being a little adventurous with positions.
Carrying out fantasies in real life (like asking your partner if they’d like to wear something particular for you).
Using toys during in bed etc.
9. You know how to adapt to a partner’s needs and wants
Adapting to your partner’s needs and wants makes you a good partner in bed.
If you don’t adapt, you might find yourself banging your head against the wall when your partner asks for something that you aren’t prepared for.
Adapting means understanding what your partner is looking for and being able to provide it—whether it’s a light or rough touch.
It also means knowing that sometimes it’s okay if things don’t work out exactly as planned.
If you’re adaptable, you’re good.
10. You make the first move
There’s no question that you’re a good lover when you initiate sex.
It means you’re confident and willing to take charge in bed, which are both major turn-ons for your partner.
When you initiate sex, you’re telling your partner that you want them.
Not only that, but initiating sex also shows your partner that they matter—that they are important enough to you that you want to be with them.
When they feel desired and special, they’ll be more willing to go along with whatever else you have planned, because they know they’re more than just an object of your desires.
I know it’s hard to initiate sex sometimes, especially if you’re shy or feel insecure about your body or performance.
But if you want to be a good lover, it’s important not only to accept but also to embrace this part of yourself and use it as a tool for connection and pleasure.
If you don’t do any of these ten things, I’m not judging you.
The fact that you’re reading this article is proof that you’re willing to improve your bedroom skills, and that’s the most important thing.