I don’t know about you, but I want my husband to always see me as the center of the universe.
I don’t want him looking at me and wondering what he was thinking proposing marriage to me.
You may think this can only happen when he no longer loves, and you’d be wrong.
A man might love your inner being and still question his choice because you keep doing things that make you look unattractive to your husband.
Keep reading if you are like me and don’t want this to happen.
I have highlighted eleven things below that make you look unattractive to your husband.
11 Things That Make You Look Unattractive To Your Husband
1. Nagging
If you gather men and ask them what they don’t like about their women, you will find that some of them mention nagging.
As a woman, I get it.
At the risk of sounding stereotypical, men and women sometimes communicate differently.
Men often pick what they want to listen to, thereby missing some important information.
For that reason, women often feel like they need to nag before men get it.
The problem with this is that it further drives a wedge between you and makes your husband more inclined not to listen.
It makes men feel like you think they are babies who cannot process information until it’s repeated over and over again.
This is also similar to yelling.
After the usual daytime hustle and bustle, the man wants to return to a quiet and peaceful home.
But if he comes home to constant yelling, it might discourage him from coming home early.
If your husband starts staying out more because he doesn’t want to deal with issues he is likely to encounter at home, it means that you’re gradually becoming unattractive to him.
So, instead of nagging and yelling, find more effective ways to communicate with your husband.
Learn his communication style and don’t address issues when he is busy, occupied, or distracted.
2. Ingratitude
No matter how good someone is, they will likely withdraw when they are not appreciated.
I understand there are many things your husband is not doing right, but how about what he is doing right?
If you appreciate him for those things, he will be more encouraged to work on the other areas.
If he often forgets to close the toilet seat, appreciate that he never forgets to throw the trash.
If he doesn’t keep his footwear where they are meant to be, be thankful that he remembered your birthday.
A simple “Thank you for doing so and so” or “I appreciate that you always do so and so” will make him feel good about himself and push him to do better because he wants to hear more.
But if he never gets appreciated for his actions, he may be discouraged and think, “What’s the point?”
I’m sure we don’t want that.
Ingratitude is subtle, but it can make you look unattractive to your husband.
3. Being Over Critical
Similar to the above, a man may begin to find his wife unattractive if she has nothing good to say about him.
He’s your husband; you married him.
Surely, something good about him convinced you to say yes to him.
So, it’s practically impossible that all you find in him are things to criticize.
Again, I understand wanting him to do better in certain areas, but you will likely not get him to respond positively when you are too critical.
Instead, he will withdraw from you, emotionally disconnect, and you’ll become more unattractive to him.
Like I said earlier, try to appreciate what he’s doing right.
But more importantly, in this context, overlook some of the things he gets wrong.
One thing to note about marriage is that not every issue must be addressed.
You must learn to pick your battles.
You can let it go if it’s not a matter of life and death and not affecting your health or livelihood.
You both are there to complement each other, so see yourself as the strength in the area where he is weak.
I’m sure there are areas where he is stronger and handles things better.
That way, you can create a peaceful atmosphere and be attractive to your man.
Being overcritical can create a toxic atmosphere in your home and marriage and cause your husband to avoid conversations with you like the plague.
After all, there is nothing attractive about an overly critical person.
4. Being Disrespectful
Disrespect is highly unattractive.
People generally go where they are respected and honored.
You’ll hardly find someone who intentionally goes or stays where they are dishonored or disrespected.
So, if you want your husband to be all over you, you need to accord him respect.
This may vary in expression as respect is relative and could vary based on culture.
But in the universal sense, you know when you disrespect someone.
Speak to your husband and relate with him as someone you value, not despise.
Be considerate, thoughtful, and polite.
Even when angry, watch your words and communicate your feelings without putting him down or cussing him out.
That will endear him to you.
5. If You Can’t Keep Secrets
So many secrets are shared when couples have their pillow talk.
This is probably why friends of married couples don’t like to share details with them or only give information they are comfortable with the other knowing.
Whatever the case, if your husband confides in you about someone else, he expects you to keep it to yourself and not share it to the point that it gets to the person.
Also, your husband will love you when he knows he can trust you with personal information, and they won’t leave your bedroom.
But when he tells you something and hears it from your family or friends, he will gradually lose attraction for you and not trust you.
6. Speaking Unseasoned Words
You may have heard the saying, “It’s not what you say, but how you say it.”
This means that you can handle even the most difficult conversations with tact and so much wisdom that the other party will not be left feeling humiliated.
In marriage, there will be cause for so many heavy discussions.
So, you cannot afford to lose it every time because you need those conversations.
Your husband should know he can discuss anything with you without fear of what will happen.
Let him know that he can feel uplifted when he talks to you.
Even when you are angry, you can communicate without damaging consequences.
If your words are always seasoned and graceful, then your husband can trust that you will speak soul-lifting words to him when he needs them, which is endearing.
However, when a woman has what is known as a “bad mouth,” the man may find her unattractive, and you can’t blame him.
7. Being Overpossessive
A little jealousy here and there can make your partner feel valued.
It shows him how much you care about him and don’t want to lose him.
However, excessive jealousy and possessiveness are unattractive.
Your husband wants to know that you trust him to do right by you.
If you are angry anytime he talks to a woman or you see a glimpse of a woman around him, it’s no longer cute jealousy; you need to work on it.
Of course, if he has cheated on you before and is still working to earn your trust, that’s understandable.
But if he has never given you a reason not to trust him, it will turn him off.
So, you need to work on your trust issues if you have some.
Going to therapy is a recommended option to avoid being paranoid and possessive.
8. Poor Self-Grooming
It is very easy to lose oneself in marriage, and that’s understandable with all one has to do.
As a woman, I get it, too.
There is the home to care for, children, and sometimes even your husband himself.
So, it’s just sometimes easy to let yourself go because you are busy and occupied.
However, men are visual beings, so we also need to put a little effort into looking good.
Sure, your husband needs to realize that some body parts can become looser due to childbirth and should love you the way you are.
Hopefully, you are not married to a superficial man who doesn’t understand this.
On the other hand, making a little more effort to look good is also a good confidence booster and great for your mental health.
If you are overwhelmed with work, consider politely delegating duties to your husband or seeking help.
Don’t attempt to be a superwoman and not have time for yourself.
Apart from the physical aspect, it will also wear you down mentally.
9. Excessive Weight Gain Or Loss
We should all note that things should always be done moderately.
Anything done in excess can be detrimental.
So, in addition to how your husband might feel about it, it’s not good for you health-wise.
If you become a shadow of yourself or far bigger than you were when your husband first met you, he may become less attracted to you.
I understand that many valid things may contribute to it, but you can still work on it.
To make it easier, involve your husband in the process and make it a team effort.
That way, you will be encouraged and not feel isolated.
10. Vanity
While your husband wants you to pay attention to your looks, he also doesn’t want you to pay so much attention that other important things in your life suffer.
Vanity turns men off.
Most men do not like it when a woman cannot stand her natural looks in a mirror or is often preening and adjusting her makeup in public.
It screams insecurity and high maintenance to them, something they avoid like a plague.
So, again, the idea is to keep things in moderation.
11. Being Selfish And Inconsiderate
Society makes it seem like men should provide while women should care for the home.
Personally, I disagree with this mentality, but let’s not bicker over that and concentrate on the practicality.
We all know how strenuous the economy is, so unless your man is wealthy, it might be challenging to handle the financial aspect alone.
Plus, if you are earning, you should be contributing as well.
This doesn’t apply if you are a SAHM, of course.
If you are not, you shouldn’t be selfish and inconsiderate by spending all your money on yourself and leaving him to handle the financial burden alone.
Conversely, he should be heavily involved in domestic care so you can both have time to earn and take care of the home and for yourself.
A person who cares only for themselves is unattractive, and your husband will find you unattractive if you are selfish and have shown evidence of self-centeredness in the past and present.
Even more so if you are manipulative and want things always to go your way.